Call my crazy, but…

I’ve decided I’m going to do at least one show next year. Baby # 2 is due May 12th, at which point I will have a newborn and an almost two year old. How did this happen to me? I don’t even like kids! I adore MY kid, but I am not a kid person in general and did not expect to have two kids, especially not so close together. But here we are.

Anyway, I am absolutely determined to do at least one show next year. I have marked on my calendar a September 25th hunter schooling show. If  it goes well, I will also ride in the schooling show on October 23rd. It is extremely hard to leave a four month old baby and a two year old for an entire day, but if my husband is willing to help out, I’m convinced it can be done. He will have to bring the kids to the show so I can take care of the baby before and after my classes. He was an absolute champ at the show last year, and I’m hoping he’ll be up for it again. I mean it’s one day out of the whole year!!! Surely he can accomodate me for one day!

Why do I feel such an urge to show? Why can’t I be happy just hacking around the barn and going on trails? I think it’s because I need to measure my progress. I want to be a GOOD rider! I want someone to hand me a ribbon and validate all the physical and mental energy I put into becoming better. I don’t necessarily have to win, but I definitely want to do better than I did last time. I want to compete against myself and watch myself place higher and higher the more I work at it. So, if I can get in one show in 2010 with a newborn and a two year old and a full time job, I think that would be fantastic!

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